Handing your children over to another person and walking away is always hard. We all know that it is part of them growing up, part of us growing as parents too, and that it is necessary; but it's hard. Because for so long, when they are teeny, we make every single painstaking decision for them. The decisions feel so hard and so scary at first, and like such a massive responsibility that we're constantly terrified we might get wrong. But over time we get used to making all those choices, to always being there to love, to cuddle, to teach, to discipline, to know that everything in their little world is just the way we would like it to be.
Four and a half months... that is the time we have left with life as we know it. The countdown is on and before I know where I am at I will be packing off my biggest baby to start big school and my littlest baby to start preschool.
I have this overwhelming feeling of time running away from me, an all too familiar feeling since becoming a parent it would seem. Time keeps racing on, and right now I feel like I'm desperately grabbing at its tail, willing it to slow down.